One of the most challenging things to do is to look at ourselves objectively.  Emotions, past experience, and individual perspective colour and distort how we see ourselves, how we view others, and how we perceive any given situation

The dynamics of our intimate relationships can reveal so much about our internal belief systems.  Relationships help us discover how we really feel about ourselves  

We fall in love with someone because unconsciously we see ourselves within this person—everything we love about this person is what we love within ourself.  When we fall out of love, it is for the same reason—we unconsciously see what we don’t love about ourself and reject that

When you experience problems in a relationship, it is easier to blame your partner rather than accept that you are the one who has chosen that particular individual and you and your reasons can teach you some very important insights about yourself

But, ego instinctively wants to shield us from the harsh realities of our own negative qualities and point the blame somewhere else.  Take a moment and write down all the things that really disturb you about your partner, a co-worker or a family member—their habits and behaviours that irritate you or ’push your buttons’  

Have you ever really stopped to think WHY these things irritate you?

Your higher consciousness has devised to clever way for you to become acutely aware of your own negative habit patterns and beliefs, both past and current.  When you see behaviour in others that triggers you in some way, it is often subconscious memories of a similar behaviour pattern within yourself, or an experience or unconscious memory from your childhood  

Are you catching yourself immediately saying "Oh no, that's not ME!"  Yes it is!  If you have never encountered something before you will have no emotional response to it.  Only memories trigger a strong response or resistance

Occasionally this can be some mental pattern or action you've already faced and overcome, and your soul now judges this as wrong.  More often, however, your perception of someone else is meant to reflect back to you what you cannot objectively see about yourself.  You haven't attained the self-awareness to own it within yourself

Unfortunately, inscrutable self honesty is not always easy.  It takes humility, objectivity, compassion and self-acceptance to admit our flaws and fully own them.  It takes courage and wisdom to accept and love ourselves unconditionally.  We may even require assistance or an objective tool such as counselling or Enlightened Feelings living flower frequencies to facilitate this

Every relationship or interaction with others forces you to deal with aspects of yourself—positive or negative—that you might otherwise overlook.  A relationship that challenges you to become aware of how you feel about yourself is really a gift for you, although it may not seem like it at the time  

For instance, no one truly possessing self-esteem would attract an abusive relationship or a narcissistic partner.  Such a person does not need to gain an awareness of the necessity and the importance of self-respect or personal dignity.  Nor would this kind of relationship be acceptable on any level to a self-respecting person.  They would reject it at the earliest warning signs

But, a person with low self esteem will naturally gravitate toward individuals who will reinforce their own negative beliefs.  You may unconsciously feel you are not good enough to be treated with more respect and care.  You could be psychologically punishing yourself for a past mistake.  Or, you are attracting the kind of criticism and judgment you unconsciously perpetuate on yourself or received as a child

Take a good look at your life.  How people treat you is a reflection of how you treat yourself and how you perceive yourself.  In your demeanour and interactions YOU provide the clues for how you expect to be treated  

Also become aware of your actions toward your children, your possessions, your car, and your home.  These things are an extension of yourself.  How you treat these things when  no one is looking is also a reflection of how do you treat yourself

Do you chastise and criticize your children?  Are you careless or neglectful about your car or belongings?  Or .. Have you created a beautiful serene home oasis for your health and wellbeing?  

Is your home, bedroom or office cluttered, disorganized or unkempt?  Maybe you are superficially tidy, but miss important details with dirty windows, overstuffed closets, junk in the garage, crumbs under the toaster, weedy gardens.  If you are not treating your possessions and creature comforts with care and respect, it's a good bet you're not looking after yourself with tender loving care either 

Now look at your relationship.  How does it compare with the subliminal messages you are creating in all the other areas of your life?  Are you beginning to see some correlations?

Whether a relationship continues to be a painful tool for your growth through fostering self-awareness, or whether you choose to walk away from a situation and take its lessons with you, it is important to see each relationship for its true value and silently bless your partner for the gift of the mirror image  

You will notice as your perspective, self-awareness and experience shifts, so too will your interpretation of what is happening.  So if you really want to change how people treat you, make some changes within.  Miraculously, the whole world around you changes when you simply change within yourself  

We are here to help make your inner change become effortless.  These Enlightened Feelings living flower frequencies can help you to create positive shifts in your self perception.  Try one of these self empowering essences...     

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